The Course of 10,000 Days Mini-Retreat on March 15-16 in San Diego

Looking for a powerful, transformational, self-help program that blends both spiritual practices with New Age techniques? Join us on Friday-Saturday, March 15-16, 2013 at the beautiful Rancho Bernardo Inn located in San Diego, CA. The theme for The Course of 10,000 Days mini-retreat is: Live-Love-Legacy! The dynamic program will focus on helping you discover your life purpose, create a lasting legacy and develop your Life Success Action Plan! For registration information: www.10000Days.org

Finding True Happiness: Is It Possible?

by Tom Hinton

At a recent workshop, I was asked by a 51 year-old participant if he could ever find true happiness? My answer startled him as well as the other participants in the room. I said, “Probably not.” 

There was a nervous laughter and everyone waited for my next line. But I said nothing and started to move on to my next point. An anxious, almost desperate look filled the participants’ eyes as they looked at me hoping for a more elaborate, encouraging statement. I waited a long moment to let the uneasiness settle inside the pit of everyone’s stomach, and then I asked the all-important question. “Why are you asking me if true happiness is possible? Is that not your responsibility? Who is in control of your life right now? Is it me, or is it you?”  It was an ah-ha moment not only for many of the participants, but also myself. I realized that most people are dependent on someone else or something else for their happiness.

When you choose to be truly happy, that is when happiness begins. The primary reason someone is unhappy is because their approach to life is all wrong. We depend on someone else or something else for our happiness. In that case, you will never be truly happy. For the source of true happiness will not be found in riches, your ideal job or in the arms of another person. True happiness lies within each and every one of us. It requires us to move beyond life’s drudgery, impatience, bitterness and the negativity we experience every day; and, replace those moments with gratitude for life and the gifts you possess. When you choose to be happy, it is at that moment that true happiness begins.

So, is it possible to find true happiness? Yes, but it requires a different approach than the one most people use. It requires you to focus on those things that make you happy. It requires you to begin now if you want to be happy at this moment. You cannot be happy and irritated at the same time. You cannot be happy and hold grudges or withhold love from someone. You cannot be bitter and also claim to be happy. You cannot expect everything to go smoothly in life and when it doesn’t curse the world, but also claim to be happy 

Yes, you can have happy moments, but that is different from experiencing true happiness. True happiness occurs when you have peace of mind and your heart is filled with gratitude and love. True happiness is knowing that you are not dependent on anything or anyone else for your state of being. When we arrive at this point, we can begin to know true happiness. 

About the Author:  Tom Hinton is one of America’s most respected authors and speakers on Personal Growth, Work-Life Balance and Achieving Your Human Potential. He is the author of four books including: 10,000 Days: The Rest of Your Life, the Best of Your Life which is available on www.Amazon.com  For information, contact: tom@tomhinton.com

Moonrise Kingdom Offers Many Insights to Real Life Issues

I recently saw the new movie, Moonrise Kingdom, featuring Bill Murray and Bruce Willis. It's a funny plot involving two twelve-year olds who fall in love, make a secret pact to escape their boring lives, and run away into the wilderness of their beautiful summer island which is reminiscent of New England or the Puget Sound. As confused authorities and a troop of misguided boy scouts try to find them, the peaceful island community is turned upside down in more ways than anyone can imagine. It's a witty story about the underlying meaning of love, adult insanity, and the complexities of life even on a sparsely populated island. I think one moral of the story is this. No matter how far we try to run from reality and life's dramas, they always seems to be waiting for just around the bend. Let me know what you think.

Junior Seau Will Be Missed

The outpouring of sympathy and affection for the late Junior Seau, the talented former NFL player, who took his life at age 43, has been heartwarming for his family and the San Diego community where he was born and raised. Not only was Seau a great football player, but he was an outstanding role model for thousands of kids and a wonderful humanitarian. This is why so many fans were saddened and shocked to learn of his untimely death.

What makes Seau's death all the more tragic is that he had everything to live for. But, for reasons we'll never know, he ended his life after struggling with bouts of depression. Living simply became too hard for Junior.

The Course of 10,000 Days reminds us that life is very precious which is why it's essential that we understand our higher purpose and strive to live it everyday. When we lose hope and can no longer dream, life becomes a terrible burden; and, for some people, dying is an easier alternative rather than struggling to find meaning and purpose in one's life. Perhaps, this was the same difficult struggle Junior Seau faced after battling depression for so many years. He will be missed.

Work-Life Balance: How to Create Balance and Maintain Your Sanity in This Crazy, Competitive World

In 2007, I made a major transition. I stopped going to work. While I still had a job, employees to supervise and a business to manage, I made the strategic decision that I was going to regain control of my life and make time for the things I enjoy and me!

It was a difficult decision because it required me to start working smarter, but not harder. It also forced me to alter my mindset in terms of working from home and not commuting to an office every day. Perhaps, this was the most difficult part of my work-life balance transition. Also, I needed to learn how to use technology so I could work smarter and be more productive. I no longer could rely on walking down the hall to ask my staff of 20-somethings to answer my techie questions.

Studies tell us that nearly 76% of Americans are unhappy in their jobs. Perhaps this explains why so many people are unfulfilled and, therefore, unhappy with their work-life balance. But, not everyone can simply decide – as I did – to stop going to an office and work from home. And, frankly, not everyone would be happy working from home. There are many people who enjoy the workplace environment, the social interaction and the office politics. They feel connected and in the know.

So, how can you create a work-life balance that works for you? Here are 5 simple steps to help you. Some of these steps might appear trivial. But, take if from one who has done it… they work!

      1.  Identify the Top Ten Priorities in your personal life and on the job.  This step will help you identify what’s really important to you, personally and professionally.

         2.  Create a Work-Life Balance Schedule based on your top ten priorities.  The goal is not to accomplish all ten of your personal and professional priorities, but rather, adhere to a schedule that allows you to start tackling your top three or four – whatever you have the time and energy to do.

         3.  Stick to Your Schedule. If, for example, your top three personal life priorities are: (1) exercise 45 minutes daily, (2) spend quality time with your family each day, and (3) completing the New York Times Sunday edition crossword puzzle each week then these are must do priorities for you. The same holds true for your top three professional priorities, whatever you deem them to be. While you may not be able to accomplish all ten of your top priorities, schedule yourself according to what you can accomplish.  

         4.  Monitor Your Results. The best way to determine if you’re moving towards your goal of creating the proper work-life balance is to monitor your results.  Have a checklist on your computer and keep score everyday of your priorities. Check them off as you accomplish them each day.

        5.  Reward Your Success. Every week, reward yourself when you’ve achieved the work-life balance you’re seeking and your checklist is complete. Remember, it’s not about 100%; rather, you’re trying to move a little closer to your goal every week. Eventually, you’ll begin to see major changes in your attitude and behavior as you edge closer to the work-life balance you seek.

Ultimately, the greatest rewards you’ll realize will come in the form of personal satisfaction, wellness and a positive outlook on life and your job. These have been the results I’ve experienced and it only took me 6 months to reach that point. Now, I’m loving life because finally I’m in control of my life. Well, almost. Excuse me for a moment while I change the cat box and take out the garbage! 

About the Author.  Tom Hinton is the author of 10,000 Days: The Rest of Your Life, the Best of Your Life! now available at: www.Amazon.com  Tom is a popular speaker on Work-Life Balance and Personal Growth topics. He also facilitates The Course of 10,000 Days retreat workshops. Contact: tom@tomhinton.com

Why is it that Los Angeles Lakers' Ron Artest wears "World Peace" on the back of his jersey and then acts like a thug in front of thousands of spectators by sucker-punching his opponent in a basketball game last week? Shouldn't Artest practice what he preaches? The Course of 10,000 Days reminds us that walking our talk is very difficult. This is especially true on the playing field when the stakes are high and it's easy to lose our cool and take unfair advantage of an opponent. In Ron Artest's case, his ill-timed punch not only has landed him in trouble with the NBA, but it also discredits him in the eyes of all those fans who supported his efforts to champion world peace. While Artest might be a good basketball player, he is a very poor role model for "World Peace" because he lacks the courage, fortitude and common sense required to wear such a lofty label. Ron Artest should go back to wearing his own name on the back of his Lakers' jersey until he can measure up to a higher standard and champion the cause he purports to embrace. Hopefully, he will rebound.

Dalai Lama Brings a Message of Peace and Hope to America

by Tom Hinton

His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama, Tenzin Gyatso, arrived in San Diego, California today and brought his simple, but powerful message of peace, hope and spiritual healing to thousands of people.

There is something both positive and serene about the 77 year-old spiritual leader of Tibet. His boyish smile and youthful energy hides his age and the many burdens he carries. Although he is a Buddhist, his love for all people shines through. His ability to forgive his enemies is profound. When the Dalai Lama was asked years ago how he could forgive the Chinese for invading his native country of Tibet and killing thousands of people, he simply replied, “It makes me feel better to forgive than to hate.”

There are many lessons we can learn from this gracious man regardless of our religious or political persuasions. Certainly, there is room in every heart for greater peace, understanding, forgiveness and love. This is his simple message and hope. How profound.

About the Author. Tom Hinton is the author of 10,000 Days: The Rest of Your Life, the Best of Your Life! Which is available at: www.Amazon.com Tom is a popular speaker on Work-Life Balance and Personal Growth topics. He also facilitates The Course of 10,000 Days retreat workshops. Contact: tom@tomhinton.com

People Are Like Roses

By Tom Hinton


Not far from my front door is a beautiful park where I enjoy walking in the early morning just after sunrise. Frequently, as I’ve completed my morning walk, I’ve seen an elderly woman arrive with her flower basket and pruning tools in one hand and a small three-legged stool in the other hand. She comes to tend to the many rose bushes that grace our neighborhood park.

Along the south entrance to the park is an arching trellis that sports several bush forms of Hybrid Teas and Floribundas. Over the years, the flower lady has trained the long canes to grow in a horizontal position in order to produce more blooms. These climber roses can’t attach themselves to the trellis, so the flower lady dutifully ties the canes onto the trellis arch for support.

Over the years, my neighbors and I have enjoyed watching these beautiful roses grow as we meander through the park and appreciate the variety of roses including hybrids, ramblers, heirlooms and even wild species roses that sprouted many decades ago and continue to blossom each year thanks to the nurturing care of the rose lady.

From time to time, I’ve reflected on the life cycle of a rose because it closely resembles our own life cycle. Experts tell us that roses can live forever with proper care. They seed, grow and flower all in the same season. And, if pruned to about 12 inches from the ground in early spring, more roses will bloom in the summer. Although roses are perennials, most of these delicate flowers require the tender, loving hand of someone like the rose lady to rejuvenate and display their beauty.

From a spiritual perspective, people require the same attention and maintenance. Like roses, we must be nurtured, cared for, pruned and even disbudded from time to time in order to rejuvenate and blossom repeatedly. Our pruning process is dependent on our Ego, Emotions and Inner Spirit. It’s through the three legs of our human essence that we evolve and grow. But, just like the rose, we also must endure a disbudding phase when things don’t go our way and life throws challenges and barriers in our path. And, like the rose, we learn to overcome these setbacks and defeats only to grow stronger and more beautiful with each pruning life lesson.

The Course of 10,000 Days reminds us that people are like roses. The average human being lives about 30,000 days. That equates to just over 82 years. We go through three very distinct life cycles every 27 years or so. The Course of 10,000 Days refers to these three cycles as our Discovery Years, Fulfillment Years and Legacy Years. While a rose completes its life cycle seasonally, people take about 10,000 days or 27 years to evolve and mature through each cycle.

Our Discovery Years, ages 1-27, are typically spent developing our personality and ego, learning values, shaping our character and behavior, and creating lifelong bonds with our family and friends. It’s during our Discovery Years that we attempt to discover our gifts and talents, and exercise our creativity. We also learn how to assess risks, make mistakes and rebound, expand our minds, learn social graces, receive a formal education, plot our career path, forge our political beliefs and values, challenge the status quo, set goals and discover the power and pitfalls of money and romance.

Our second 10,000 days are our Fulfillment Years, ages 27-54. Most people spend their Fulfillment Years building their resume, acquiring money, searching for a life companion, starting a family, laying down roots, striving to achieve their goals, traveling and consuming all the world has to offer.

Ironically, as many people complete their Fulfillment Years, they come to realize they are, in fact, unfulfilled because they have failed to live their dreams or achieve their goals. Unlike the rose, which takes its shape, color and beauty from nature’s cue, people take their cue primarily from their ego. When we realize that our Fulfillment Years have been reduced to climbing the corporate ladder, chasing someone else’s definition of success, and keeping up with the Joneses, we yearn for all our yesterdays. It’s a stark moment in our lives when we come to the realization that we squandered our best years living someone else’s dream instead of pursuing our own. It’s distressing to realize that we are completely ego-driven and have little connection with our Inner Spirit, nor any satisfactory explanation as to who we really are and why we exist on a spiritual level.

When we arrive at this quiescent point in our life, it marks the beginning of a major transformation or a series of life changes. Just like the rose, which in the dead of winter appears dormant and lifeless, there is a strange phenomenon taking place deep within us. This is the point when we come face-to-face with our third 10,000 days, known as our Legacy Years. It’s at this moment – usually around our mid-50s -- that we realize something significant in our life is missing. Like the rose that seeks the earth’s nutrients and sunshine, we yearn for purpose, peace and a sense of passion in life. Only the gentle, steady guiding hand of our Inner Spirit can help us find these attributes within ourselves. But how do we reconnect with our Inner Spirit?

Ultimately, nature provides the way for us just like the rose. When we ask our Inner Spirit to help us find meaningful answers to life’s most difficult questions, we will be transformed. Like the rose that receives energy from the sun as winter yields to spring, our Inner Spirit is the nutrient that helps us discover our higher purpose and leads us to a life of happiness and fulfillment. But first, we must realize that our ego is incapable of answering life’s most humbling questions and guiding us to our destiny. Only our Inner Spirit is capable of doing this. It is simply part of our human design.

The natural cycle of life allows us time – 10,000 Days – to discover our higher purpose and find happiness and fulfillment. It’s during our Legacy Years that we can blossom into a spiritual being and, like the rose, allow our natural beauty to emerge. Of course, we must do this despite the fact that our ego will fight us. Like an ugly weed in the garden, our ego attempts to dominate our Inner Spirit in order to remain in control.

But, like the rose lady who appears faithfully several times each week to nurture and prune the roses in our park, you must strive to allow your Inner Spirit to be heard and act if you want to create a life worth remembering and live your dreams. That is what The Course of 10,000 Days teaches us and helps us accomplish.

Factors such as your age, gender, geographic location and education level have very little to do with your ability to succeed in completing this important transformation. More important is your commitment and willingness to open your heart and mind so that you can experience an inner awakening that will bring about those positive changes and results you desire. Ultimately, as our Inner Spirit surfaces and guides us, we are like the rose that emerges from a blanket of deep white snow to become a beautiful flower for all to admire. If we take the time to cultivate our Inner Spirit, we can realize our dreams and highest aspirations. This is how we create meaning and purpose in our lives and live a life worth remembering.

About the Author: Tom Hinton is one of America’s most respected authors and speakers on Personal Growth, Work-Life Balance and Achieving Your Human Potential. He is the author of four books including: 10,000 Days: The Rest of Your Life, the Best of Your Life which is available on www.Amazon.com For information, contact: tom@tomhinton.com

Finding the Life Balance between Fulfillment and Success

by Tom Hinton

At a recent corporate workshop I facilitated on Work-Life Balance, a senior executive with the company asked me a tough question. Our exchange went something like this. “I’ve been working here for the past 30 years. I’m now 55, and even though I have a senior management position in this company, and make good money, and I’ve traveled the world, I don’t feel successful. What’s missing in my life?”

Although we had never met before, I reflected on his question for a moment and then replied, “I think sometimes we confuse success with fulfillment and happiness. It seems you have all the trappings of success, but what appears to be missing in your life is a sense of fulfillment.” He nodded affirmatively and encouraged me to expound on my answer. I did; and, here’s what I shared with the participants at that workshop.

One of the questions The Course of 10,000 Days encourages us to answer is the following: “How much happiness am I willing to forego in order to achieve success?” This is a tough question for us because we’re used to having it all without having to sacrifice anything. But, the truth is success comes with a price.

We all know people who are very successful, but are miserable. They have lots of money, power and fame, but few real friends. They have rank and privilege, but no one really loves them for who they really are. This is the dilemma that many – but not all --successful people face. Why?

The Course of 10,000 Days explains it this way. Before you seek success, you should first create abundance in your life. Only when you experience the blessings of life, true happiness and peace-of-mind can you enjoy success. Too often, we measure success in terms of the ego’s needs – money, power, fame, prestige and all the trappings that success can buy us. But, abundance is rooted not in material things, but in those things that allow us to be truly happy and experience peace-of-mind. Under such circumstances, we could experience abundance and still be earning minimum wage. Abundance is achieved not through our ego, but rather, our Inner Spirit. Thus, it is our Inner Spirit that we must turn to in order to find those things that create happiness and peace-of-mind in our life. Our ego does not care about such things. It only enjoys the trappings of success. But, such things do not satisfy the human spirit for long. This is why we yearn for something more permanent, more satisfying. And, that something is abundance in our life.

While The Course of 10,000 Days embraces the motto, “Ask and you shall succeed!” it teaches us that in order to attain true success, we must ask our Inner Spirit, not our ego.

About the Author: Tom Hinton is the author of the new best-seller: 10,000 Days: The Rest of Your Life, the Best of Your Life. Tom is one of America’s most respected authors and speakers on Work-Life Balance, Personal Development and Human Excellence in the Workplace. To order 10,000 Days, visit: http://www.amazon.com/10-000-Days-Rest-Your/dp/0983503214/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1326344004&sr=1-1 or contact Tom at: tom@tomhinton.com