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Monday, April 16, 2012

People Are Like Roses

By Tom Hinton


Not far from my front door is a beautiful park where I enjoy walking in the early morning just after sunrise. Frequently, as I’ve completed my morning walk, I’ve seen an elderly woman arrive with her flower basket and pruning tools in one hand and a small three-legged stool in the other hand. She comes to tend to the many rose bushes that grace our neighborhood park.

Along the south entrance to the park is an arching trellis that sports several bush forms of Hybrid Teas and Floribundas. Over the years, the flower lady has trained the long canes to grow in a horizontal position in order to produce more blooms. These climber roses can’t attach themselves to the trellis, so the flower lady dutifully ties the canes onto the trellis arch for support.

Over the years, my neighbors and I have enjoyed watching these beautiful roses grow as we meander through the park and appreciate the variety of roses including hybrids, ramblers, heirlooms and even wild species roses that sprouted many decades ago and continue to blossom each year thanks to the nurturing care of the rose lady.

From time to time, I’ve reflected on the life cycle of a rose because it closely resembles our own life cycle. Experts tell us that roses can live forever with proper care. They seed, grow and flower all in the same season. And, if pruned to about 12 inches from the ground in early spring, more roses will bloom in the summer. Although roses are perennials, most of these delicate flowers require the tender, loving hand of someone like the rose lady to rejuvenate and display their beauty.

From a spiritual perspective, people require the same attention and maintenance. Like roses, we must be nurtured, cared for, pruned and even disbudded from time to time in order to rejuvenate and blossom repeatedly. Our pruning process is dependent on our Ego, Emotions and Inner Spirit. It’s through the three legs of our human essence that we evolve and grow. But, just like the rose, we also must endure a disbudding phase when things don’t go our way and life throws challenges and barriers in our path. And, like the rose, we learn to overcome these setbacks and defeats only to grow stronger and more beautiful with each pruning life lesson.

The Course of 10,000 Days reminds us that people are like roses. The average human being lives about 30,000 days. That equates to just over 82 years. We go through three very distinct life cycles every 27 years or so. The Course of 10,000 Days refers to these three cycles as our Discovery Years, Fulfillment Years and Legacy Years. While a rose completes its life cycle seasonally, people take about 10,000 days or 27 years to evolve and mature through each cycle.

Our Discovery Years, ages 1-27, are typically spent developing our personality and ego, learning values, shaping our character and behavior, and creating lifelong bonds with our family and friends. It’s during our Discovery Years that we attempt to discover our gifts and talents, and exercise our creativity. We also learn how to assess risks, make mistakes and rebound, expand our minds, learn social graces, receive a formal education, plot our career path, forge our political beliefs and values, challenge the status quo, set goals and discover the power and pitfalls of money and romance.

Our second 10,000 days are our Fulfillment Years, ages 27-54. Most people spend their Fulfillment Years building their resume, acquiring money, searching for a life companion, starting a family, laying down roots, striving to achieve their goals, traveling and consuming all the world has to offer.

Ironically, as many people complete their Fulfillment Years, they come to realize they are, in fact, unfulfilled because they have failed to live their dreams or achieve their goals. Unlike the rose, which takes its shape, color and beauty from nature’s cue, people take their cue primarily from their ego. When we realize that our Fulfillment Years have been reduced to climbing the corporate ladder, chasing someone else’s definition of success, and keeping up with the Joneses, we yearn for all our yesterdays. It’s a stark moment in our lives when we come to the realization that we squandered our best years living someone else’s dream instead of pursuing our own. It’s distressing to realize that we are completely ego-driven and have little connection with our Inner Spirit, nor any satisfactory explanation as to who we really are and why we exist on a spiritual level.

When we arrive at this quiescent point in our life, it marks the beginning of a major transformation or a series of life changes. Just like the rose, which in the dead of winter appears dormant and lifeless, there is a strange phenomenon taking place deep within us. This is the point when we come face-to-face with our third 10,000 days, known as our Legacy Years. It’s at this moment – usually around our mid-50s -- that we realize something significant in our life is missing. Like the rose that seeks the earth’s nutrients and sunshine, we yearn for purpose, peace and a sense of passion in life. Only the gentle, steady guiding hand of our Inner Spirit can help us find these attributes within ourselves. But how do we reconnect with our Inner Spirit?

Ultimately, nature provides the way for us just like the rose. When we ask our Inner Spirit to help us find meaningful answers to life’s most difficult questions, we will be transformed. Like the rose that receives energy from the sun as winter yields to spring, our Inner Spirit is the nutrient that helps us discover our higher purpose and leads us to a life of happiness and fulfillment. But first, we must realize that our ego is incapable of answering life’s most humbling questions and guiding us to our destiny. Only our Inner Spirit is capable of doing this. It is simply part of our human design.

The natural cycle of life allows us time – 10,000 Days – to discover our higher purpose and find happiness and fulfillment. It’s during our Legacy Years that we can blossom into a spiritual being and, like the rose, allow our natural beauty to emerge. Of course, we must do this despite the fact that our ego will fight us. Like an ugly weed in the garden, our ego attempts to dominate our Inner Spirit in order to remain in control.

But, like the rose lady who appears faithfully several times each week to nurture and prune the roses in our park, you must strive to allow your Inner Spirit to be heard and act if you want to create a life worth remembering and live your dreams. That is what The Course of 10,000 Days teaches us and helps us accomplish.

Factors such as your age, gender, geographic location and education level have very little to do with your ability to succeed in completing this important transformation. More important is your commitment and willingness to open your heart and mind so that you can experience an inner awakening that will bring about those positive changes and results you desire. Ultimately, as our Inner Spirit surfaces and guides us, we are like the rose that emerges from a blanket of deep white snow to become a beautiful flower for all to admire. If we take the time to cultivate our Inner Spirit, we can realize our dreams and highest aspirations. This is how we create meaning and purpose in our lives and live a life worth remembering.

About the Author: Tom Hinton is one of America’s most respected authors and speakers on Personal Growth, Work-Life Balance and Achieving Your Human Potential. He is the author of four books including: 10,000 Days: The Rest of Your Life, the Best of Your Life which is available on www.Amazon.com For information, contact: tom@tomhinton.com

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Finding the Life Balance between Fulfillment and Success

by Tom Hinton

At a recent corporate workshop I facilitated on Work-Life Balance, a senior executive with the company asked me a tough question. Our exchange went something like this. “I’ve been working here for the past 30 years. I’m now 55, and even though I have a senior management position in this company, and make good money, and I’ve traveled the world, I don’t feel successful. What’s missing in my life?”

Although we had never met before, I reflected on his question for a moment and then replied, “I think sometimes we confuse success with fulfillment and happiness. It seems you have all the trappings of success, but what appears to be missing in your life is a sense of fulfillment.” He nodded affirmatively and encouraged me to expound on my answer. I did; and, here’s what I shared with the participants at that workshop.

One of the questions The Course of 10,000 Days encourages us to answer is the following: “How much happiness am I willing to forego in order to achieve success?” This is a tough question for us because we’re used to having it all without having to sacrifice anything. But, the truth is success comes with a price.

We all know people who are very successful, but are miserable. They have lots of money, power and fame, but few real friends. They have rank and privilege, but no one really loves them for who they really are. This is the dilemma that many – but not all --successful people face. Why?

The Course of 10,000 Days explains it this way. Before you seek success, you should first create abundance in your life. Only when you experience the blessings of life, true happiness and peace-of-mind can you enjoy success. Too often, we measure success in terms of the ego’s needs – money, power, fame, prestige and all the trappings that success can buy us. But, abundance is rooted not in material things, but in those things that allow us to be truly happy and experience peace-of-mind. Under such circumstances, we could experience abundance and still be earning minimum wage. Abundance is achieved not through our ego, but rather, our Inner Spirit. Thus, it is our Inner Spirit that we must turn to in order to find those things that create happiness and peace-of-mind in our life. Our ego does not care about such things. It only enjoys the trappings of success. But, such things do not satisfy the human spirit for long. This is why we yearn for something more permanent, more satisfying. And, that something is abundance in our life.

While The Course of 10,000 Days embraces the motto, “Ask and you shall succeed!” it teaches us that in order to attain true success, we must ask our Inner Spirit, not our ego.

About the Author: Tom Hinton is the author of the new best-seller: 10,000 Days: The Rest of Your Life, the Best of Your Life. Tom is one of America’s most respected authors and speakers on Work-Life Balance, Personal Development and Human Excellence in the Workplace. To order 10,000 Days, visit: http://www.amazon.com/10-000-Days-Rest-Your/dp/0983503214/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1326344004&sr=1-1 or contact Tom at: tom@tomhinton.com

Thursday, November 17, 2011

The Wheel of Life: Wellness

Author’s Note:
This is the second in a series of eight articles that focus on the eight elements in the Wheel of Life, which I discuss in my book, 10,000 Days: The Rest of Your Life, the Best of Your Life! The eight elements are: Spirituality, Relationships, Environment, Career, Money, Wellness, Romance, and Fun & Recreation.

Last week I began this series with an article on Environment. This week I focus on Wellness.

When facilitating The Course of 10,000 Days retreats, I like to ask participants to define their state of Wellness. Interestingly, nearly every participant responds in terms of their physical state of well-being. Some will tell me they need to lose weight. Others will advise me that they are recuperating from an operation, a serious illness or fighting an addiction. But, oddly enough, very few people ever mention their mental, emotional or spiritual well-being as part of their Wellness formula.

In an era when health care is dominated by our physical aspects, we tend to forget that Wellness involves much more. The Course of 10,000 Days defines Wellness as “a multi-dimensional state of well-being in which you enjoy a positive physical, mental, emotional and spiritual balance, thus allowing you to live your life to its fullest.” Using this definition, the significance of Wellness becomes much more apparent in how we achieve purpose, peace and happiness in our life.

Not only is Wellness multi-dimensional, but it is also sub-dimensional. The National Wellness Institute, which has done an excellent job in researching this topic, advocates six sub-areas of Wellness. They are: Social, Occupational, Spiritual, Physical, Intellectual and Emotional Wellness. I encourage you to visit their website to read the definitions of each of these six sub-areas. It is: http://www.nationalwellness.org

The Course of 10,000 Days encourages us to take Wellness seriously. Many of us know family members or close friends who have died prematurely or their quality of life is suffering because they did not take care of themselves physically or mentally. These are the two dominant categories of Wellness. But, in order to achieve a state of Wellness in accordance with the definition used by The Course of 10,000 Days, it’s vital that we pay attention to all six sub-dimensions of Wellness. As the Wellness Institute suggests, “We may not all be physically fit or free from disease; we can, however, strive for increased wellness by working with what we’ve been dealt.”

Dr. Leif Livingheart, a brilliant physician who leads Life Transformation retreats in Spain, tells us, “Wellness is not merely the absence of illness. It is also your ability to create a positive physical, mental, emotional and spiritual balance, thus allowing you to live your life to its fullest.” I agree with Dr. Livingheart’s assessment because our life-systems are inter-connected and, therefore, can sustain or disrupt each other. For example, if we’re emotionally distraught, that will affect our physical and mental dispositions. So, this is why we believe it’s important for people to make the mental transition from “avoiding illness” to “living life to its fullest!”

Here are a few ways you can practice Wellness.

* BAG It. Every morning as you awake, practice the “BAG It” exercise. Think of three Blessings you have in your life, and three Accomplishments you've completed in the past 24 hours. Then, set three Goals you will achieve in the next 24 hours. It's very powerful and when you awake tomorrow, today's Goals become tomorrow's Accomplishments!
* Move. It’s tough to exercise every day unless you’re a dedicated gym rat, but you can get some exercise by parking farther away from your office door, taking the stairs instead of the building elevator, or enjoying a lunchtime stroll around the block. If you sit at a desk all day, you need to counter that inertia by moving at least 20-30 minutes every work day. Also, if you're active on a keyboard, take 5 minutes every hour to flex your fingers and palms to avoid carpal tunnel syndrome which causes damage to your median nerve in the palms and forearms.
* Fast. For most people, weight control is a matter of moving more and eating less. That’s very difficult for most of us, so we need to consciously choose to eat less, and simply change what we eat. Losing weight is primarily about how many calories we shove into mouth every day as well as the types of food we eat. So, here are a few proven ideas attendees who lost weight shared at The Course of 10,000 Days Weekend Retreat: skip breakfast; absolutely no “whites [salt, bread, sugar, dairy] during the work week; eat salads three times a week with light dressings; eat fish twice a week; include vegetables at least three times a week instead of French fries or chips; eat boiled food instead of fried foods; drink sparkling water or ice tea, and avoid sodas and juices that are loaded with sugar. do this and watch the pounds drop off you! But, remember, you also have to "Move!"
* Meditate. Don’t confuse meditation with prayer or having to go to church. Meditation is simply closing your eyes for 20-30 minutes a few times each week and allowing you mind to rest. Lay down on the bed or the living room floor and dim the lights. Sometimes, spa-type music can help you enter that state of calm and relaxation. This exercise will quiet your mind and help you relax, let go of today’s problems and reduce your stress levels. You'll be amazed at how refreshed you are when you're done.
* Set Goals. Set a few small goals for yourself every day. This could be part of your BAG It exercise mentioned earlier. By setting goals, you will continuously push yourself to aim at something you want to accomplish. In this way, you’ll always be striving to accomplish the goals you set. And, remember Dr. Ken Blanchard's goal setting formula for setting SMART Goals, which means: Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic and Time certain.

I can guarantee you that if you’ll do these few things, your state of Wellness will improve. And, the healthier you are, the happier you will be. As always I look forward to your feedback. Let me know what works best for you.

About the Author. Tom Hinton is the author of 10,000 Days: The Rest of Your Life, the Best of Your Life! that is now available as an eBook or paperback at: www.Amazon.com Tom is a popular speaker on Work-Life Balance and Personal Growth topics. He also facilitates The Course of 10,000 Days retreat workshops. Contact: tom@tomhinton.com

Saturday, November 5, 2011

The Wheel of Life

This article is the first in a series of eight by author Tom Hinton on the Wheel of Life


I realize it’s only November, but many people have asked me this question: “What can I do now to jump-start some of the positive changes I want to make in my life for next year?”

It’s a great question and here’s my response. Over the next eight weeks, I’ll be posting a series of eight brief articles that focus on each of the 8 elements in the Wheel of Life. Since I’ve been teaching The Course of 10,000 Days for the past six years, it’s become clear that the primary concerns and issues facing people are related to one or more elements in their Wheel of Life. So, together, we’ll explore these eight elements and, hopefully, shed some insight to help you move forward by making your next 10,000 days significant!

But, first, here’s some background on the Wheel of Life. Legend has it that the Buddha himself created the first depiction of the Wheel of Life -- or Bhavacakra -- as it’s referred to in Buddhism. The original Wheel of Life design adorns most Buddhist Temples.

Over the centuries, this concept has evolved to take on many different interpretations. For example, the version created by The Course of 10,000 Days equates eight equally important elements to its Wheel of Life. In no particular order, they are: Spirituality, Relationships, Environment, Career, Money, Wellness, Romance, and Fun & Recreation.

This article will focus on Environment. When we use the term Environment in The Course of 10,000 Days, we mean the following: What is the living, working, cultural and growth environment you currently exist in?

What’s fascinating to me is that 99% of the people who enroll in The Course of 10,000 Days have never given a moment’s thought to this aspect of their lives. Ironically, it isn’t until we think about retirement that the issue of Environment even surfaces. And, frankly, most people define Environment as “where they want to live when they retire.” But, this is only one aspect of Environment. The bigger picture must take into consideration not only where you live, but also where you work, the people you associate with, your ability to grow and develop as a person and spiritual being, and your ability to spend time developing your talents and gifts. Now you can see why Environment is so critical to one’s success in life and our ability to achieve life balance.

So, here’s your assignment for this week. Take a sheet of paper and turn it sideways (landscape version). Across the top of the page, draw five columns and label each one as follows: Where I Live; Where I Work; People I Associate With; My Ability to Grow; and, How I Spend my Time.

Then, in each of the columns, write your responses to the following questions:
• What are the positive aspects of __________ [where I live, where I work, etc.]?
• What are the negative aspects of __________ [where I live, where I work, etc.]?
• What steps can I take in the next 30 days to change the negative to a positive in each of these five areas?
• What action will I take today (or the next 24 hours) to implement that change?

Here’s an example of how one 52 year-old female student at The Course of 10,000 Days Weekend Retreat responded to the question: “Where I Live?”

-- Positive Aspects include: close to my 84 year-old mother; it’s where I work; I have a small circle of friends; I’ve lived here 33 years and know the area including shops, bank, and my church; I enjoy the four seasons.

-- Negative Aspects include: it’s cold and dreary in the winter (Midwest USA) and it’s humid in the summer; I stay indoors too much because of the weather and don’t exercise; I have a job but I’m not advancing in terms of pay or position; very little culture other than a movie theater in my small town; my two best friends are approaching retirement and talking about moving to Florida; my church is in turmoil because of sex scandal issues with a former minister; my company has laid off 12% of its 400 employees and I feel insecure in this job and economy; my two sisters live near Atlanta with their kids; I feel obligated to care for Mom since I’m the only sibling still living in the same town where we grew up; I'm single and there's very little social life or privacy in a small town.

-- Steps I Can Take in the Next 30 Days include: I’m going to start researching new places to live in Florida or Georgia; I’m going to talk to Mom about relocating; I’m going to update my resume and put out some feelers. I’m going to tell my sisters I’ve decided to relocate as soon as possible, which they’ve encouraged me to do.

-- What Actions will I take Today? I will talk to Mom at lunch today about the benefits of moving to a warmer climate near her daughters and four grandchildren; I will update my resume; I will Google similar companies in my industry to see who is hiring.

There’s a great expression we use in The Course of 10,000 Days that goes like this: Nothing happens until you commit to doing something and then act! What this exercise will help you do is simply that – commit to doing something and then act.

While your situation is different and unique, no one is hopeless or helpless. You can do something to improve your life and take steps to make the rest of your life, the best of your life! So, start now by evaluating your Environment!

About the Author. Tom Hinton is the author of 10,000 Days: The Rest of Your Life, the Best of Your Life! that is now available as an eBook or paperback at: www.Amazon.com Tom is a popular speaker on Work-Life Balance and Personal Growth topics. He also facilitates The Course of 10,000 Days retreat workshops. Contact: tom@tomhinton.com

Thursday, February 3, 2011

You Can Do Something!

by Tom Hinton

Recently, at a weekend retreat I facilitated on The Course of 10,000 Days, I asked attendees the following question. “Tell me one thing you can do right now to improve your life and start to get the results you desire?” This question is designed to get people thinking about taking that all-important next step to create change in their lives and achieve their goals.

Invariably, this question meets resistance from some attendees who are so stuck in their own velvet rut that they cannot climb out of it. For example, some attendees are stuck in life because they lost a spouse, a family member or a dear friend. For others, their self-esteem has suffered a serious blow because they lost their job or their home as a result of tough economic times. Still, there are some who are so consumed with anger and resentment towards an ex-spouse or boss that they’ve never been able to get past it. Regardless of the reason, the fact remains that we get stuck in life because we fail to accept the fact that we have the power to change our life, move forward and live our dreams.

This is what The Course of 10,000 Days is all about. It’s a process by which we confront the demons in our life and learn how to quiet our ego so our Inner Spirit can surface and guide us to our destiny. For, it is through our Inner Spirit that we create our greatest outcomes in life. No one should have to live their life according to someone else's terms. We have the power to create our own outcomes. We have the power to achieve our own destiny. This is what makes us unique and transforms ordinary people into extraordinary human beings.

And so, when you are asked the question — “Tell me one thing you can do right now to improve your life and start to get the results you desire?” — your answer can be as simple as “I will think positive thoughts about myself.” Or, “I will believe in my own goals and dreams.” Or, “I will start to research my pet project, or read a book, or accept the fact that I can do something today – even if it is taking a baby step in the right direction – to move my life forward.”

For each of us, the answer to the question will be different. What matters is that you must be able to answer the question – and answer it with conviction; then, act on whatever it is you said you would do. It is in this way cathedrals have been built – one stone at a time. It is the same way Walt Disney created Disneyland and America was founded and grew, and man was able to land on the moon. Nothing is impossible, but you must believe in yourself and be willing to do something right now to move your life forward. Even if that something is a small step forward.

So, let me ask you once again, “Tell me one thing you can do right now to improve your life and start to get the results you desire?”

About the Author: Tom Hinton is the author of the new book entitled, 10,000 Days: The Secret to Finding Purpose, Peace and Passion for the Rest of Your Life, which will be available March 11th on www.tomhinton.com Tom is a popular speaker at corporate and association meetings on such topics as Leadership, Creating your Legacy and Achieving Your Life Goals. He can be reached at tom@tomhinton.com

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

The Egyptian Lesson: What Consumer-Citizens of the World Really Want

by Tom Hinton

It’s both disturbing and encouraging to see the strife taking place in Egypt and Tunisia. In America, we take for granted so many of our basic rights and entitlements that are causing millions of citizens to take to the streets in protest of the policies of their authoritarian governments. It’s disturbing because the very rights and opportunities these people are demanding are basic economic building blocks that every citizen should enjoy regardless of where they live or the religion they practice – freedom of speech, the opportunity to live in an economic environment that offers hope for a better life, and the right to assemble without being shot or attacked by armed thugs operating under the guise of self-serving politicians.

What is playing out in Egypt and Tunisia is also encouraging because the voice of the people is finally being heard. And, it is being heard not only in the streets, but within the inner sanctums of every repressive government around the world.

Some commentators have suggested the Arab uprisings are being fueled by fanatics and religious extremists. There’s little, if any, evidence to support such claims. I believe these protests are the result of frustrated consumers who see unlimited economic opportunities in neighboring countries and throughout western societies. Unfulfilled, exasperated and without any chance to climb the economic ladder of success, these well-intentioned protesters are asking a basic human question of their tyrannical leaders: “Why can’t we enjoy the good life?” Not only is it a fair question, but one that every government should respond to or face defeat. But, governments that exploit their citizenry don’t believe they need to answer such questions because they are not in the business of lifting-up the masses. They’re in the business of suppressing human and economic rights and controlling citizens in brutal fashion.

This is why leaders like ousted Tunisian President Zine El Abidine Ben Ali and Egypt’s President Hosni Mubarak do not remain in power. People will only tolerate so much before they take to the streets. What is happening in Egypt and Tunisia are consumer-citizens demanding the same economic opportunities afforded to a handful of people in their country and the chance to enjoy the fruits of their labor. Certainly, that is a fair demand.

No nation’s leadership can suppress the population forever and outlast the will of its people. This is why I believe there is still great economic hope for the people of Iran, North Korea, Libya, Myanmar, North Korea, Somalia, China, Sudan, Turkmenistan and Uzbekistan. As we have seen in Egypt, it only takes a few thousand people to ignite the flames of economic freedom and bring about significant constitutional change as well as new political leadership.

In this era of social networking and instant global communication, it’s not surprising that on a Friday afternoon, a handful of well-intentioned thought leaders tweet or Facebook their friends to rally in the main square and, by Sunday afternoon, ministers are resigning and corrupt leaders are making plans to flee the country.

Frankly, it’s consumerism at its best!

About the Author: Tom Hinton is a popular speaker and author on personal development and creating a lasting legacy. He can be reached at tom@tomhinton.com

Monday, January 24, 2011

Regina Brett's 45 Life Lessons

Every now and then, I'm fortunate to stumble across something special -- words of wisdom that inspire me and put life in perspective. Here's a beautiful piece written By Regina Brett, a 54-year old columnist for Cleveland's The Plain Dealer newspaper.
I hope you enjoy it and pass it on to those who need a smile today.
Tom Hinton

"To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me... It is the most-requested column I've ever written. My odometer rolled over to 90 in August, so here is the column once more:
1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first pay check.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words ’In five years, will this matter?'
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
33. Believe in miracles.
35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood.
38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we’d grab ours back.
41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
42. The best is yet to come.
43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
44. Yield.
45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.